playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize