My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
