When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
