Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I wish i was in the wii world.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
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