So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize