I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
tell me about the eggs
Randomize