I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
