Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
