Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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