Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
