i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
