yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize