Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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