is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Randomize