i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
