Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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