I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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