No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
