So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
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