do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Randomize
