Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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