If i come over, it means nothing
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
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