is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
