Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
