Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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