we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
