The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
