I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize