i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Randomize
