Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
