Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
