Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
no you cant smoke seaweed
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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