Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
