Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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