Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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