Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
