You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Randomize