We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
