Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
