I'm drive I can fine osifer
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
