I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
