i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
he was CRYING into my vagina
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I'm sobbing to NWA
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Randomize
