god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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