Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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