at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
