Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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