i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
