I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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