is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
