I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Oh god it's open bar.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
