Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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