She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
